Friday, November 30, 2007

Blue Vested Hell

This blog is brought to you today by Danny. As a new effort on the part of my "PR people", I am including a reader request blog, if I ever get any reader requests. Danny isn't the most up to date reader of my blog, but he happens to be sitting next to me at the moment, so he got the first request. He said "write about walmart."

The Walmart at my house makes me crazy. It is constantly completely packed. No matter how early or late I go there, there are hordes of people with drooling screaming children in their shopping carts. They stand in the middle of the aisle and don't move, even when you are actively pushing yourself around them. They park their carts diagonally by a display and glare at you when you move it over so you can squeeze by. They push you aside if you happen to be standing in front of the item they want. They get up to the cash register and then argue about the price of each item they have. And they have 300 items. And after the cashier has finished ringing them up, they remember they need diet pepsi.

I can go into Walmart feeling calm and at peace with the world, and come out a raving maniac. I find myself getting more and more aggressive in there. I've started playing chicken with the people who walk two abreast and take up the whole aisle. When someone pushes me, I push back. One of these days I'll end up run over by a shopping cart. Or I'll end up one of those people you hear about on the news, who loses it when someone takes the last bottle of Pantene Pro-V and begins whacking them over the head with one of those pool noodles.

If you hear about someone taking hostages in a Walmart, please come bail me out of jail :)
Also, if you have a subject you would like me to blog about, leave me a comment and I promise to write about it.

2 comments:

katohater said...

is it the convenience or the low prices that keep you returning to that hell?

katohater said...

please blog about kon tiki's crappy rules and policies.