I wrote this poem in 2007 apparently. I have no memory of writing it. But I re-read it, and I like it. So here you go.
he said, examining the differing spaces
between rib and pelvis.
And suddenly the daily fossilization
of the muscles of my neck and back
became, not the product of anxiety and stress,
but the fault of a spinal cord
that took a sudden detour to the right.
I saw myself as a negative
an x-rayed line of crooked bones
with limbs hanging haphazardly
like a shirt askew on a hanger.
My mind, always the culprit,
the careless driver careening down the road,
for once was not responsible for the pain.
I walked out of the office carefully
feeling that, at any moment, I may veer off course,
a fate for which I appear to be destined
Thursday, December 17, 2009
It's a little pathetic, really. I have had no motivation to do anything for the past....oh, three weeks. I turned in my final papers of the semester and officially switched off my brain. It didn't occur to me until yesterday that Christmas is NEXT WEEK. We don't have a Christmas tree. No lights on the house. We didn't have any presents for anyone until a frantic trip to Walmart yesterday evening. I haven't been blogging, haven't been doing anything productive at work, have stopped running....hell people should be grateful I'm managing to shower every day. What have I been doing? Honestly, I couldn't tell you. I compulsively check facebook. I've been reading murder mysteries late into the night when I should be asleep. And for the last week I have been watching TV beamed into our house by our shiny new satellite dish. Prior to this magical "dish" we had a giant 1950s antenna shoved in our chimney, which picked up about 4 channels one of which would go out whenever a bird landed on the antenna. We solved this problem by yelling "GET OFF THE ROOF!!" whenever we lost a channel. Now, though, we have satellite. I am again one with popular culture. I can watch all of the hideous reality shows I can stomach (and that's a lot, believe me), and I have DVR which means that if Tough Love is on at the same time as Charm School, I can record one of them to watch later.
Once I get out of this funk I plan on trying to launch the Tucson chapter of the Idiotarod. I read about this many moons ago and immediately felt it was my destiny to participate in such a glorious event. It may have something to do with my affinity for shopping carts, a love affair that included a shopping cart I stole from the U of A campus, painted purple, and then was wheeled around campus in for an evening. You think I exaggerate??
Me and shopping carts, man. We go way back. And 2010 WILL be the year of the Tucson Idiotarod.